my wondertwin.

the new and improved wondertwins.

When I heard that he was resigning, it was like a sock in the stomach, a knife through the heart and a slap to the face. When I knew only 30 days were left, I was a barrel of emotions. Shock, pain, grief, denial, anger, worry, panic, sad, disappointed, surprised and maybe a hefty more others that I cannot remember but I feel.

You don’t spend 6 years with someone close only to taken away in an instant.

And talk about pouring rock salt, bitter and gashed into the wounds.

I didn’t want to hear him say his goodbyes so I went  around and took pictures during the time he was saying his final words in the office.

2 work days has passed since he left…and I go to the office in tears and very disturbed. The empty seat next to Helen was screaming. When it wasn’t him tinkering on the server next to me, it feels weird, and when I look for him if I wanted to drag someone for coffee or to talk about work stuff…

I found him not there and I would cry silently in my seat, shoulders shaking.  When we had a brunch out with the project mates, I knew someone was missing. And when Helen told me.

Sick leave…it’s been two days

I knew he wasn’t really there and I had to give myself some dignity and hastily wipe the tears that escaped from my eyes.
I tried to joke about it, but my voice breaks and my eyes have grown swollen and smaller than the usual, forming into horizontal slits.

He was a big part of your life

And he really is…

…I really don’t know what to say.